For those who aren’t familiar with the app Tinder, it is an online dating app that matches people in close proximity using your location and Facebook profile so as to inhibit creation of fake profiles. Name, age and any information you wish to share is posted to a profile.
Based on the picture and profile viewed you may swipe left to reject, or right to accept the person. If both individuals swipe right, it’s a match!
You are then opened to a messaging room where either person can commence in conversation. The rest is up to you. Despite the ease of meeting people, it comes with seven challenges.
1. Tinder is the epitome of shallow.
The whole purpose of the app is to cast judgment based on what you like or dislike in an individual, it is based on solely physical appearance. Men are like dogs on Tinder swiping right on all the tasty-looking bones. Beautiful women understand that many men don’t have the time or guts to approach them in person. Tinder makes it easy, a word most commonly connected with shallow. Those in search of a hook-up perk up the brassiere or pump up the biceps. Any chances of “love at first sight” are not made in a day-to-day setting, but are manufactured in cyberspace without depth or a story. Just “we met on Tinder.”
2. Photos are deceiving.
There is much trickery and false advertising in the photos and portraits posted on Tinder and social media as a whole. Users want to be viewed favorably so as to get as many “swipes right” as possible. Nothing is seen through the human eye, it’s not organic or natural. Photoshop, Instagram filters, Wonder Woman bras and meticulous lighting on lack of curves and muscles give impressions that are not reality. The realization comes when you meet your “match” at an absurdly well-lit coffee shop and find out what’s beneath the headshot.
3. Beware of attention whores.
Beware those who look for a boost of confidence or need to feed their ravenous egos. They may not even be on the search for a relationship or casual encounter. They merely enjoy the fact that there is someone in pursuit of them. The spotlight is exhilarating, but the human emotions on the other side mean nothing. There will be very little genuine connection or conversation, and time will be wasted filling their narcissistic tank, leaving you running on empty.
4. Communicating online or through text is a whole new monster.
Tinder is all fun and games with messaging, and keeps you on your toes with clever things to say. Sooner or later the pick up lines will run out. Some carry the skill of texting or messaging exceptionally well, but when met in person are not as laxed or competent in dialect and word play. Who really wants a relationship that is only exciting through a device? There are facial expressions and body gestures that commit a wider understanding of a person’s personality. The actual feeling of presence can be electric and compelling, or they can take you to dullsville with their uninspiring aura. These are the things that you find entering a face-to-face interaction from the beginning.
5. All time is spent on the app. Spend it on the playing grounds.
Tinder is a scapegoat for you not to put your pride at stake. We are an online culture, the technologic generation that has lost touch with practicing real human interaction. We prefer uncomplicated and unchallenging dating rituals, which promise ease of access without chance of error or disappointment. Picking up a man/woman the old-fashioned way, simply put, shows a lot more “balls.” Not to mention it shows a powerful display of dedication proving to the person they are worth it.
It proves they are not just a split decision made on a whim with a swipe of your TinderFinger.
6. It’s a market of buy and sell. Sometime you don’t get what you bargained for.
We have all been shopping on Amazon for some miscellaneous object we have use for. Summary claims it comes with a 100 percent guarantee of satisfaction. When it comes in the mail our anticipatory smiles quickly turn into frowns of disdain. The same sad story comes with Tinder.
A woman will strictly state she’s not into hook-ups, so naturally the man is a perfect gentleman attaining trust and security. His desirable attributes are sold through messaging. When successfully granted a date, he goes for more than she bargained for at the end of the night. Tall tales are told, and time is wasted.
7. Addiction to the app can leave an empty void.
First you check Facebook, then Instagram and when there is nothing left to satisfy you through those social medias – Tinder is the last resort. Almost like a fatal last cry for attention or recognition. Whether it is a casual encounter you seek, or a search for true love, it is an easy fix. Like a drug that keeps you coming back for more. The difference between drugs and Tinder is you don’t have to pay for it. What happens when your phone dies at last call at the bar? Those hooked will most likely not pursue the attractive individual across the way.
They will go home to charge their phone, and continue swiping. Of course there are millions of lonely people on Tinder, but I believe successful human interaction cannot happen through apps like Tinder. Social presence is key, connection through emotion, face-to-face, and interpersonal exchange in initial acquaintances. If you believe in that, look up “Social Presence Theory.” Stop swiping and apply yourself in the real world.
